I am at a loss for words.
Truly, no word can accurately portray how I feel for this blarg. It is beyond compare. Even more so; it is the blarg that all other blargs shall be compared to. Far beyond this time, when our era has faded away, when they speak of the legendary tales of ages past, the small child will look up to his father and ask, "Can you please read me Beauty and the Blarg? That one's my favorite!" Yes, that's right. It is on a timeless level that cannot be matched; to be placed on the pedestals of blarg, alongside all other champions of blarg who have proved their blargness a thousand times over. That is it. The perfect blarg. May it's tale live on in history forevermore!