How the Kingdom Hearts series was made

[Kaweebo 3,617]

So, I found this and thought it was funny. Enjoy. All credits go to someone on Tumblr named skypillar

 

KINGDOM HEARTS 1

Nomura: thank you so much for meeting me, I know how valuable your time is

Disney lawyers: the pleasure’s all ours, sir. you said you had a business proposal about how to profitably combine some of our intellectual properties with your Final Fantasy series?

Nomura: yes [pulls out laptop] ok so I wrote this crossover fic

 

CHAIN OF MEMORIES

Nomura: okay team that first game was pretty good but we’re gonna have to step it up. how about we make like, a card-based battle system in this one?

Staff: sir is that a yugioh card falling out of your sleeve

Nomura: also for the storyline I want to introduce a bunch of new characters who are all plotting amongst each other for mysterious reasons and then have them all die violent deaths

Staff: sir have you been reading Game of Thrones

Staff: sir

 

KINGDOM HEARTS 2

Nomura: ok let’s do everything we did in the first game but EVEN MORE BETTER

Staff: sir are you sure you sent this through QC? the plot is kind of…I mean the tutorial mode stars a different character and is 3 hours long?

Nomura: also use the triangle button a lot, that one’s my fave

Staff: this doesn’t really wrap up the story very well?

Nomura: triangle button

 

358/2 DAYS

Nomura: look it’s really not THAT weird

Staff: sir we’re just not sure you can make a game about existential angst that ends with a child goading her best friend into assisting with her suicide? we’re working with disney here

Nomura: legal said it was ok as long as I never do it again

 

BIRTH BY SLEEP

Staff: sir I thought you said we couldn’t make any more games about dead children

Nomura: none of them die. one becomes a comatose vegetable, one is damned to wander hell for eternity, and one is possessed by a sociopath and loses his mind

Staff: how did you—

Nomura: none of them die, legal couldn’t touch it

 

RE:CODED

Nomura: remake the cell phone thing as a game

Staff: what? why? I thought we were supposed to—

Nomura: [scribbling furiously] make the phone game. stall for time. I am Planning

 

DREAM DROP DISTANCE

Nomura: [sets posterboard down] and THAT’S the whole plot so far

Staff: but that doesn’t even…make any…oh god. Oh god. there are hints about these things in the past FOUR games. how many drugs are you on??

Nomura: yes

 

KH CHI

Nomura: you know, I’ve always wanted to make a KH MMO…

Staff: what?? but that would be so much work to update and maintain

Nomura: don’t worry, we’ll keep it really simple, it’ll be a piece of cake. we won’t even release it outside of japan

 

UNCHAINED X

Staff: YOU SAID WE WOULDN’T RELEASE CHI OUTSIDE OF JAPAN

Nomura: we’re not. we’re remaking it as a cell phone game–

Staff: WE ALREADY MADE AND THEN REMADE A CELL PHONE GAME

Nomura: –and releasing that outside of japan. also we’re gonna keep updating it concurrently with the original browser game, because of reasons.

Staff: you promised…..you’d keep it simple….

Nomura: well i accidentally a lot of plot so

 

2.8 PROLOGUE FINAL CHAPTER

Staff: sir this is. this is literally not even a real game. it’s a game remake and a random movie and a half-game you wanted to make like five years ago. how did you get this approved when we’re supposed to be making kh3

Nomura: oh it was pretty easy, i just explained the idea to the president the same way I just did to you guys

Staff: and he said yes???

Nomura: well he signed the budget request while crying and saying ‘please just go away’

Edited September 19, 2015 by Kaweebo

[KeybladeLordCheeseCurd 1,542]

So, I found this and thought it was funny. Enjoy. All credits go to someone on Tumblr named skypillar

 

KINGDOM HEARTS 1

Nomura: [/size]thank you so much for meeting me, I know how valuable your time is

Disney lawyers: [/size]the pleasure’s all ours, sir. you said you had a business proposal about how to profitably combine some of our intellectual properties with your Final Fantasy series?

Nomura: [/size]yes [pulls out laptop] ok so I wrote this crossover fic

 

CHAIN OF MEMORIES

Nomura: [/size]okay team that first game was pretty good but we’re gonna have to step it up. how about we make like, a card-based battle system in this one?

Staff:[/size] sir is that a yugioh card falling out of your sleeve

Nomura: [/size]also for the storyline I want to introduce a bunch of new characters who are all plotting amongst each other for mysterious reasons and then have them all die violent deaths

Staff: [/size]sir have you been reading Game of Thrones

Staff: [/size]sir

 

KINGDOM HEARTS 2

Nomura: [/size]ok let’s do everything we did in the first game but EVEN MORE BETTER

Staff: [/size]sir are you sure you sent this through QC? the plot is kind of…I mean the tutorial mode stars a different character and is 3 hours long?

Nomura: [/size]also use the triangle button a lot, that one’s my fave

Staff: [/size]this doesn’t really wrap up the story very well?

Nomura: [/size]triangle button

 

358/2 DAYS

Nomura[/size]: look it’s really not THAT weird

Staff: [/size]sir we’re just not sure you can make a game about existential angst that ends with a child goading her best friend into assisting with her suicide? we’re working with disney here

Nomura: [/size]legal said it was ok as long as I never do it again

 

BIRTH BY SLEEP

Staff: [/size]sir I thought you said we couldn’t make any more games about dead children

Nomura: [/size]none of them die. one becomes a comatose vegetable, one is damned to wander hell for eternity, and one is possessed by a sociopath and loses his mind

Staff: [/size]how did you—

Nomura: [/size]none of them die, legal couldn’t touch it

 

RE:CODED

Nomura: [/size]remake the cell phone thing as a game

Staff: [/size]what? why? I thought we were supposed to—

Nomura: [/size][scribbling furiously] make the phone game. stall for time. I am Planning

 

DREAM DROP DISTANCE

Nomura: [/size][sets posterboard down] and THAT’S the whole plot so far

Staff: [/size]but that doesn’t even…make any…oh god. Oh god. there are hints about these things in the past FOUR games. how many drugs are you on??

Nomura: [/size]yes

 

 

 

 

 

KH CHI

Nomura:[/size] you know, I’ve always wanted to make a KH MMO…

Staff:[/size] what?? but that would be so much work to update and maintain

Nomura:[/size] don’t worry, we’ll keep it really simple, it’ll be a piece of cake. we won’t even release it outside of japan

 

UNCHAINED X

Staff:[/size] YOU SAID WE WOULDN’T RELEASE CHI OUTSIDE OF JAPAN

Nomura: [/size]we’re not. we’re remaking it as a cell phone game–

Staff:[/size] WE ALREADY MADE AND THEN REMADE A CELL PHONE GAME

Nomura:[/size] –and releasing that outside of japan. also we’re gonna keep updating it concurrently with the original browser game, because of reasons.

Staff: [/size]you promised…..you’d keep it simple….

Nomura:[/size] well i accidentally a lot of plot so

 

2.8 PROLOGUE FINAL CHAPTER

Staff: [/size]sir this is. this is literally not even a real game. it’s a game remake and a random movie and a half-game you wanted to make like five years ago. how did you get this approved when we’re supposed to be making kh3

Nomura: [/size]oh it was pretty easy, i just explained the idea to the president the same way I just did to you guys

Staff:[/size] and he said yes???

Nomura: [/size]well he signed the budget request while crying and saying ‘please just go away’

 

Me: I approve Nomura.

 

KINGDOM HEARTS III

 

*epic concert, fireworks*

 

Nomura: MY MAGNUM OPUS IS COMPLETE

Edited September 19, 2015 by KeybladeLordSora

[Jake 1,488]

It's funny because this feels so true.

[Dave 5,715]

Nothing about this would surprise me if it were the real case.

[kybldmstr94 55]

My favorite part:

 

Nomura: none of them die. one becomes a comatose vegetable, one is damned to wander hell for eternity, and one is possessed by a sociopath and loses his mind

[WakelessDream 2,278]

Haha this is hilarious. I think 358/2 Days, KH3D, and 2.8 cracked me up the most. "Legal said it was ok as long as I never do it again" "How many drugs are you on?" and "He signed the budget request while crying and saying 'please just go away.'" Haha that's gold. 

 

It's probably close enough to the truth anyways.

[Shulk 8,623]

TRIANGLE IS THE ONLY BUTTON THAT MATTERS

[Jake 1,488]

Haha this is hilarious. I think 358/2 Days, KH3D, and 2.8 cracked me up the most. "Legal said it was ok as long as I never do it again" "How many drugs are you on?" and "He signed the budget request while crying and saying 'please just go away.'" Haha that's gold. 

 

It's probably close enough to the truth anyways.

Nomura has a 'special' method of being clever like he is.

[Psychic_Ketchup 367]

"How many drugs are you on?" "Yes." Damn this is good

[KeybladeLordCheeseCurd 1,542]

Nomura has a 'special' method of being clever like he is.

I imagine KH3 being Nomura screaming that his masterpiece is complete

[- Existic - 206]

I love the Birth By Sleep and Dream Drop Distance one.

Staff: How many drugs are you on?!
Nomura: Yes.



 

[Jake 1,488]

Hey look, the KH2 one was true!

 

 

Hashimoto has stated that the new features in Kingdom Hearts II were the result of the success of the first game and Disneys increased trust in Square Enix to pull off an excellent product.

 

tada!

[Col.Random 3,683]

The BBS on is my favourite

I imagine KH3 being Nomura screaming that his masterpiece is complete

and then he'd do the mad scientist laughter

[KeybladeLordCheeseCurd 1,542]

The BBS on is my favourite xDand then he'd do the mad scientist laughter

All while a rock concert and a Metal Gear Rising battle is going on.

[GotMilk5101520 573]

I seen this post on Tumblr already, but it still makes me laugh

[Grotesquery 603]

This is where the Kingdom Hearts fan-base peaks I think, nothing that any of us do will ever come close to touching this and I think we all just need to accept that.

[DragonMaster 1,166]

That was quite hilarious. Loved the ones about Days and BbS the most, though I'll admit that "how many drugs are you on?" "yes" and the signing the budget while crying were amazing as well.

[blue way finder 3]

Staff: you promised…..you’d keep it simple….

Nomura: well i accidentally put a lot of plot so

 

Lol started simple and then it sky rocketed. This is so perfect

[Philip Ellwell 5,487]

" A game about existential angst that ends with a child goading her best friend into assisting with her suicide"

That's it, that's Days, right there. 

Sad but true. 

 

how many drugs are you on??

yes

Edited October 5, 2015 by Jack Vladimir Frost

[Snow 1,800]

I imagine the president being into yugioh and final fantasy and disney and whenever nomura presents his ideas he says "yes that's amazing nomura take my car keys go to my house and have sex with my wife"

[MythrilMagician 6,963]

Triangle button.