Need help for an essay

[Yuya Sakaki 5,212]

Hey KH13. How is everybody doing? Well? That's good! Well as the title states, I need help with this essay I have to write for English and our area of study is the concept of belonging. For this essay I have to use two poems from "Immigrant Chronicle" by Peter Skrzynecki (pronounced Shi-nes-ki, if you are not sure look them up, they are great poems), and one related text of my own. The related text that I am thinking to use is, in fact, Kingdom Hearts. I know they may not seem to relate, but in English almost anything is possible! Now I have multiple ideas about techniques used throughout the series that link to this concept but I want to hear your opinions and interpretations on the subject. Also, tell me if you agree with me using Kingdom Hearts as my related text. If not, tell me why because your opinions matter! English is not exactly my forte. Thanks in advance guys!

 

Peace.

[catmaster0116 2,676]

Im assuming you are doing the HSC in Australia, please correct me if I am mistaken

 

I commend you for your devotion to KH, but personally I wouldn't use a Video game for a HSC text...

 

You only get one shot at the HSC so do your very best even if it means using texts you will not completely agree with. KH is a video game and is generally frowned upon by preliminary and HSC exam markers since it does not have alot of language techniques from what I understand (unless you can really show the language techniques and explain with relation to belonging). But up to you - some people I know used Anime and it didn't give them good marks.

 

I guess it also depends if you are doing english standard, english advanced or extension english (and it also depends if you are aiming for high marks or to scrape a pas) ~ eitherway if you wish to use a Text, I would recommend a book or even the lyrics to a song over a video game unless you are very confident with what you are writing.

 

If you want to use KH, show me 5 instances of belonging being portrayed and the language techniques used by Square Enix to support this. The worse thing you can do is ramble on and recite the story of KH, english is the art of language analysis not story telling, its what sets apart a band 3 from a band 6 response.

Edited November 15, 2013 by catmaster0116

[Lalalablah 1,539]

Whenever I have to write an essay I first describe the topic, then give experiences, followed by insight. For the experience part you could also just pull out examples from the poem and Kingdom Hearts

[Sora'sMum 352]

Im assuming you are doing the HSC in Australia, please correct me if I am mistaken

VCE exams are pretty much finished (except for languages), and HSC usually finishes a couple of weeks before VCE. So I doubt it would be for HSC. 

And I HIGHLY doubt they'd allow students to pick whatever text they like in an ATAR dependent exam. I did VCE last year. I studied Literature, not English, but basically the same except we had to write a different type of essay. But still, the English exam's essay topics are determined by course-set texts, not whatever you like. 

 

So I'd take a punt and say this guy is just doing an essay for homework. 

 

 

CAELUM!! This info is for you:

A good, general essay format is TEEL; Topic, Example, Explanation, Link. (for each main body paragraph). 

Topic = The argument/point you wish to talk about in this paragraph. 

Example = An example of where this is present in the text. 

Explanation = An explanation of how this example is relevant to the argument and the overall topic for the essay.

Link = A concluding statement, summarising the argument and linking back to topic.

 

Each part of TEEL blends into the next, so it's not like a defined dot-point system of write this, then this, then this. Let the writing flow, but make sure to cover all ground and give a concise (and detailed) explanation of everything. So don't blab on, repeating things, and don't leave things unexplained or underdeveloped.

Edited November 15, 2013 by Sora'sMum

[Yuya Sakaki 5,212]

Im assuming you are doing the HSC in Australia, please correct me if I am mistaken

 

I commend you for your devotion to KH, but personally I wouldn't use a Video game for a HSC text...

 

You only get one shot at the HSC so do your very best even if it means using texts you will not completely agree with. KH is a video game and is generally frowned upon by preliminary and HSC exam markers since it does not have alot of language techniques from what I understand (unless you can really show the language techniques and explain with relation to belonging). But up to you - some people I know used Anime and it didn't give them good marks.

 

I guess it also depends if you are doing english standard, english advanced or extension english (and it also depends if you are aiming for high marks or to scrape a pas) ~ eitherway if you wish to use a Text, I would recommend a book or even the lyrics to a song over a video game unless you are very confident with what you are writing.

 

If you want to use KH, show me 5 instances of belonging being portrayed and the language techniques used by Square Enix to support this. The worse thing you can do is ramble on and recite the story of KH, english is the art of language analysis not story telling, its what sets apart a band 3 from a band 6 response.

Yes I am studying for the HSC but I do not have to sit the exams until next year, I have only just begun the HSC work. I am in English Standard. As I stated above, it is still undecided what text I want to use. I was merely asking for opinions. What if I chose a specific game in the series, say 358/2 Days? The situation with Roxas and Xion, and, to an extent, Axel can be analysed and linked to the concept of belonging, with their identity, origins and whatnot. And besides, any text can be analysed and interpreted. An essay is stating your opinion on the topic and using evidence from certain texts to back it up. Not trying to argue or anything, just stating my opinion, but I will take your suggestion into consideration. Thanks.

 

VCE exams are pretty much finished (except for languages), and HSC usually finishes a couple of weeks before VCE. So I doubt it would be for HSC. 

And I HIGHLY doubt they'd allow students to pick whatever text they like in an ATAR dependent exam. I did VCE last year. I studied Literature, not English, but basically the same except we had to write a different type of essay. But still, the English exam's essay topics are determined by course-set texts, not whatever you like. 

 

So I'd take a punt and say this guy is just doing an essay for homework. 

 

 

CAELUM!! This info is for you:

A good, general essay format is TEEL; Topic, Example, Explanation, Link. (for each main body paragraph). 

Topic = The argument/point you wish to talk about in this paragraph. 

Example = An example of where this is present in the text. 

Explanation = An explanation of how this example is relevant to the argument and the overall topic for the essay.

Link = A concluding statement, summarising the argument and linking back to topic.

 

Each part of TEEL blends into the next, so it's not like a defined dot-point system of write this, then this, then this. Let the writing flow, but make sure to cover all ground and give a concise (and detailed) explanation of everything. So don't blab on, repeating things, and don't leave things unexplained or underdeveloped.

As I stated earlier, this is not for the actual HSC exam. I do not sit the exams until next year. This is actually for a class test coming up soon. So you are correct. I already know the structure of a body paragraph and an essay in general, but still I know you were only trying to help And you actually can choose your related text, they just prescribe texts for you that have to be used in the essay. Thanks for the help!

 

Whenever I have to write an essay I first describe the topic, then give experiences, followed by insight. For the experience part you could also just pull out examples from the poem and Kingdom Hearts

Well I kind of have to use examples from the poems and the related text as I stated earlier, so I do not really have a choice there. Thanks for your contribution!

[catmaster0116 2,676]

Yes I am studying for the HSC but I do not have to sit the exams until next year, I have only just begun the HSC work. I am in English Standard. As I stated above, it is still undecided what text I want to use. I was merely asking for opinions. What if I chose a specific game in the series, say 358/2 Days? The situation with Roxas and Xion, and, to an extent, Axel can be analysed and linked to the concept of belonging, with their identity, origins and whatnot. And besides, any text can be analysed and interpreted. An essay is stating your opinion on the topic and using evidence from certain texts to back it up. Not trying to argue or anything, just stating my opinion, but I will take your suggestion into consideration. Thanks.

 

Hey, I'm really sorry if I sounded like I was an asshole ~ and I'm not trying to argue with you either ~ Its just my opinion too

 

I just wanted for you to score as best as you can. You are absolutely right that any text can be analysed and the decision to use a chosen text is ultimately yours.

I had private tutoring when I did my HSC and and both my school teacher and my tutor advised against using video games

My area of study was 'Journeys' when I did mine and I did at one point consider Final Fantasy X for my related text for journeys but I decided against it after advice from my tutor and my colleagues who did Extension 2 English (And I don't regret it, because I scored band 5/6 in the end).

But then again I was in advanced English then so maybe the rules for choosing related texts might be different for standard English,

 

Eitherway: My point is, just do the best as you can - you are most welcome to use KH as a related text - if you do end up using KH ~ do keep us updated how you go because I am interested as well.

And remember to write cohesively, to explain using language techniques and to not story tell (i.e. don't say the story of how Xion/Roxas/Axel don't belong, rather explain using imagery, visual techniques).

• I'll give you one example of a language/visual technique - the use of Xion's hood when she speaks to certain characters might be symbolic of how comfortable she feels with that characters (a sense of belonging perhaps?). And then you can say that she has her hood down with Roxas and Axel denoting a certain sense of belonging with those characters while she has her hood predominantly up when she interacts with other characters which shows she does not feel a sense of belonging....or something like that.
• I've noticed alot of contrast in Days, the repeat usage of black on white might suggest something??

Anyway, I'll stop rambling ~

My brother is doing HSC next year too (Advanced English), So as his older brother I've given him similar advice and he's smashing it .

 

All the best and good luck with everything

[Kirie 3,489]

what i learned is follow the usual rules 

Who? What? Where? How?.

If not then i don't know what an essay is. ):