Political of Cows around the world

[Deadshot 666]

An American Democrat

You have two cows.

Your neighbor has none.

You feel guilty for being successful.

You vote people into office that put a tax on your cows, forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax.

The people you voted for then take tax money, buy a cow and give it to your neighbor.

You feel righteous and Barbara Streisand sings for you.

 

Communist

 

You have two cows.

The government seizes both and provides you with milk.

You wait in line for hours to get it.

It is expensive and sour

 

Tolatarianism

 

You have two cows.

The government takes them and denies they ever existed.

Milk is banned

 

Hong Kong capitalism

 

You have two cows.

You sell three of them to your publicly - listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother - in - law at the bank, then execute a debt / equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows.

The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows' milk back to the listed company.

The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because the fung shui is bad.

 

Anarchy

 

You have two cows.

Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to kill you and take the cows

 

Bureaucracy

 

You have two cows.

At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them.

Then it pays you not to milk them.

After that it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain.

Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows

 

British democracy

 

You have two cows.

You feed them sheeps' brains and they go mad.

The government doesn't do anything

 

Singaporean democracy

 

You have two cows.

The government fines you for keeping two unlicensed farm animals in an apartment

 

Dictatorship

 

You have two cows.

The government takes both and shoots you

 

Democracy, American style

 

The government promises to give you two cows if you vote for it.

After the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures.

The press dubs the affair "Cowgate"

 

An Arkansas Corporation

 

You have two cows.

That one on the left is kinda cute.

 

A Chinese Corporation

 

You have two cows.

You have 300 people milking them.

You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported on them.

 

An Israeli Corporation

 

There are these two Jewish cows, right?

They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights.

They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors.

So, who needs people?

 

German Corporation

 

You have two cows.

You engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves..

Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

 

Russian Corporation

 

You have two cows.

You drink some vodka.

You count them and learn you have five cows.

You drink some more vodka.

You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.

The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.

 

 

[Emo/Yami 37]

one question: WHY?

[Eterna 274]

[RoxSox 3,593]

Eterna... I'm finding myself more and more loving you with every post!

[qwigoqwaga 7]

LOL love how much math these make sense

(lol *fails for how much grammar the above sentence had *

[Eterna 274]

Eterna... I'm finding myself more and more loving you with every post!

 

 

:heart: