Is our age difference too great?

[Oniaku 280]

Good. But still man, five years. Couldn't you have looked for someone around you're age? She's barely beginning her teen years.

 

I wasn't looking. We met, and we fell in love. Simple. Real love, where all you want to do in your life is protect her and make her happy.

Edited August 27, 2012 by Oniaku

[Sammi 63]

Waiting until both of you are older is absolutely fine. As long as you're not jumping into bed with her whilst she's still underage.

[xXVentusfanXx 33]

A few is like 5-8 or more

 

 

i just hope you two are both still into each other when five years has past since thats a really big commitment to one person

[Oniaku 280]

Waiting until both of you are older is absolutely fine. As long as you're not jumping into bed with her whilst she's still underage.

 

No we're both christian, so we both want to wait til marriage, lol.

[Sammi 63]

No we're both christian, so we both want to wait til marriage, lol.

 

Even better. You get my seal of approval!

[Oniaku 280]

Even better. You get my seal of approval!

 

Thank you

[Koko 3,944]

As long as you're not doing anything it should be fine, but be aware that she's still young and not as mature and can change her mind

[Amon 4,279]

The problem? I'm 18, She's 13.

 

 

Edited August 27, 2012 by Amon

[Oniaku 280]

As long as you're not doing anything it should be fine, but be aware that she's still young and not as mature and can change her mind

 

Yeah, I know she might.

[TheApprenticeofKingMickey 3,689]

Why are you all making such a big deal out of the age gap? Um, it's only five years? You can accept things like homosexuality but you're all acting like a five year age gap is slightly taboo? Smh.

 

As long as you're not doing anything it should be fine, but be aware that she's still young and not as mature and can change her mind

 

Pretty much this. I think, considering the age she's at, contemplating marriage is not really something you do now. My personal opinion and advice is to focus on strengthning your relationship now. From the sound of it, you guys sound really in love and I hope things work out for the both of you. (:

 

I'm no expert though.

[Kirie 3,489]

If you love her that's good people at any age should love each other but don't get her pregnant in a young age,cause she will regret it,so be wise.

[Oniaku 280]

Why are you all making such a big deal out of the age gap? Um, it's only five years? You can accept things like homosexuality but you're all acting like a five year age gap is slightly taboo? Smh.

 

 

 

Pretty much this. I think, considering the age she's at, contemplating marriage is not really something you do now. My personal opinion and advice is to focus on strengthning your relationship now. From the sound of it, you guys sound really in love and I hope things work out for the both of you. (:

 

I'm no expert though.

 

Thank you for the supporting post.

 

 

If you love her that's good people at any age should love each other but don't get her pregnant in a young age,cause she will regret it,so be wise.

 

As stated above, we aren't going to have sex until after marriage so it isn't a problem.

[HarLea Quinn 26,501]

Why are you all making such a big deal out of the age gap? Um, it's only five years? You can accept things like homosexuality but you're all acting like a five year age gap is slightly taboo? Smh.

 

 

 

Pretty much this. I think, considering the age she's at, contemplating marriage is not really something you do now. My personal opinion and advice is to focus on strengthning your relationship now. From the sound of it, you guys sound really in love and I hope things work out for the both of you. (:

 

I'm no expert though.

 

Because at 13 and 18 its a huge age gap considering where teens are emotionally and maturely.. If they were 21 and 26 five years would be nothing . But they arent . At that age they dont even know themselves what they want let alone making serious commitments .But as long as there is no sexual activity i'm not gonna think badly of him either .

[Azure Flame 670]

Why are you all making such a big deal out of the age gap? Um, it's only five years? You can accept things like homosexuality but you're all acting like a five year age gap is slightly taboo? Smh.

It's not the ammount of years, but the actual ages. Five years is no big deal, but 18 dating 13 is, becase it's an adult with a child.

[Kirie 3,489]

Thank you for the supporting post.

 

 

 

 

As stated above, we aren't going to have sex until after marriage so it isn't a problem.

 

Okay i'm glad you found some one you love.

[MyDixieRect 2,061]

Why are you all making such a big deal out of the age gap? Um, it's only five years? You can accept things like homosexuality but you're all acting like a five year age gap is slightly taboo? Smh.

 

Because there's really nothing wrong with homosexuality. Besides, it's not the 5 year age difference that's the problem in itself. When it makes one of the partners and adult and the other a child then yes, that is a problem.

 

And why would a 13 year old or even an 18 year old be contemplating marriage?

 

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess that it's an online relationship since 18 and 13 year olds don't really hang and socialize. That just brings further problems into the mix.

[Oniaku 280]

Because there's really nothing wrong with homosexuality. Besides, it's not the 5 year age difference that's the problem in itself. When it makes one of the partners and adult and the other a child then yes, that is a problem.

 

And why would a 13 year old or even an 18 year old be contemplating marriage?

 

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess that it's an online relationship since 18 and 13 year olds don't really hang and socialize. That just brings further problems into the mix.

 

It's not an online relationship. and so what your saying is if i had been 17 it would have been perfectly fin?

Edited August 28, 2012 by Oniaku

[Robbie the Wise 5,050]

Why are you all making such a big deal out of the age gap? Um, it's only five years? You can accept things like homosexuality but you're all acting like a five year age gap is slightly taboo? Smh.

 

The age gap itself is not the issue it's the actual ages of the parties involved that is the issue. When your dealing with a child and an adult you always have to consider the safety of the younger party. At thirteen a child is going through so many physical and emotional descisions that they can't be held to make those kind of choices. Not to mention they won't even have the same personality (because they have yet to fully develop their own) so how could they commit to someone else if they don't even truly know themselves . There is a sound difference between accepting homosexuality and this scenario so Idk why you bring that up. Edited August 28, 2012 by devereauxr

[MyDixieRect 2,061]

 

 

It's not an online relationship. and so what your saying is if i had been 17 it would have been perfectly fin?

 

Then my bad. No, because you're still on opposite ends of puberty for one, you'd still be in completely different places in life regarding almost everything, especially since as a 17 year old you should've started planning/preparing for independence to take effect in about a year or so. For two people to last in a relationship they must be on the same wavelength emotionally. The emotional maturity (for your sake especially) between you two should be very different and much greater on your part than a what would have been a 12 year old at the time otherwise you're just in for a lot of crap life's gonna throw at you that you won't be able to deal with. It's just worse when you're 18 because that's when the law comes into play at full force.

 

The odds are against you with this relationship and not to sound rude but if you're honestly compatible with a 13 year old then should this relationship fail, you may not get another one for a very long time since in Uni and the adult world people are far beyond their early teen years emotionally, so if you aren't then there's really hardly anyone else you can be compatible with out there.

[TheApprenticeofKingMickey 3,689]

Because at 13 and 18 its a huge age gap considering where teens are emotionally and maturely.. If they were 21 and 26 five years would be nothing . But they arent . At that age they dont even know themselves what they want let alone making serious commitments .But as long as there is no sexual activity i'm not gonna think badly of him either .

 

It's not the ammount of years, but the actual ages. Five years is no big deal, but 18 dating 13 is, becase it's an adult with a child.

 

Because there's really nothing wrong with homosexuality. Besides, it's not the 5 year age difference that's the problem in itself. When it makes one of the partners and adult and the other a child then yes, that is a problem.

 

And why would a 13 year old or even an 18 year old be contemplating marriage?

 

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess that it's an online relationship since 18 and 13 year olds don't really hang and socialize. That just brings further problems into the mix.

 

The age gap itself is not the issue it's the actual ages of the parties involved that is the issue. When your dealing with a child and an adult you always have to consider the safety of the younger party. At thirteen a child is going through so many physical and emotional descisions that they can't be held to make those kind of choices. Not to mention they won't even have the same personality (because they have yet to fully develop their own) so how could they commit to someone else if they don't even truly know themselves . There is a sound difference between accepting homosexuality and this scenario so Idk why you bring that up.

 

You're all acting like I'm not aware of this.

 

I keep this in mind but I don't frown upon it. If anything, he can wait until she's even sixteen before going forward with the relationship or even having a relationship at all. But the way you're all disapproving of his feelings for her as well as his intentions, is like ganging up on him and that's what I don't like.

[HarLea Quinn 26,501]

You're all acting like I'm not aware of this.

 

I keep this in mind but I don't frown upon it. If anything, he can wait until she's even sixteen before going forward with the relationship or even having a relationship at all. But the way you're all disapproving of his feelings for her as well as his intentions, is like ganging up on him and that's what I don't like.

 

How are any of us ganging up on him ? He came here asking for everyones opinion . So we gave ours. Are we suppose to tell him what he wants to hear or our honest opinion ?.If I had a 13 year old daughter I sure as heck would not approve of her dating an 18 yr old . I also stated my reasons why . Did i call him a pedobear ? NO.. But do I think this relationship is appropriate ? No..If he truly loves her he would simply keep this relationship at a slow pace and let her mature more before even discussing marriage and long term commitments .

[Robbie the Wise 5,050]

 

 

 

 

 

You're all acting like I'm not aware of this.

 

I keep this in mind but I don't frown upon it. If anything, he can wait until she's even sixteen before going forward with the relationship or even having a relationship at all. But the way you're all disapproving of his feelings for her as well as his intentions, is like ganging up on him and that's what I don't like.

 

But he asked us his opinion, we all proceeded to answer. Even if someone doesn't like our answer it does not mean we are ganging up on him just that we disagree with the situation.

[MyDixieRect 2,061]

 

 

 

 

 

You're all acting like I'm not aware of this.

 

I keep this in mind but I don't frown upon it. If anything, he can wait until she's even sixteen before going forward with the relationship or even having a relationship at all. But the way you're all disapproving of his feelings for her as well as his intentions, is like ganging up on him and that's what I don't like.

 

Well no, the TC asked a question and we answered it. No one's doing it in a way that's offensive to the TC as a person so it can hardly be called ganging up. We gave our honest opinions. That is all.

 

It's like if he said "I like KH1. What do you guys think" and we all said "Nah, I think KH2 was better" are we ganging up on him then? No he asks for our opinion and we give it.

Bah, FlamingLea and devereauxr beat me to it.

Edited August 28, 2012 by Winner's Proof

[baylaust 2,531]

One of the things about love is that it's hard to control who you end up falling in love with. In this case, there's a situation that a lot of people are going to disagree with that you have. It's important to consider that, but if the two of you are in love and it's what you want, there's no real reason to let anyone change your minds. You obviously need to consider the fact that there is a very good chance things could change in the future (marriage talk IS a bit early) and to avoid doing anything that could get the two of you into trouble, but if you can work with that, then by all means go for it.

 

And you should probably lay off of Genn, guys. Maybe you weren't ganging up on the guy, but it definitely seems like you're ganging up on her right now, and that's no better. Let's end this before it starts to get out of hand.

[HarLea Quinn 26,501]

One of the things about love is that it's hard to control who you end up falling in love with. In this case, there's a situation that a lot of people are going to disagree with that you have. It's important to consider that, but if the two of you are in love and it's what you want, there's no real reason to let anyone change your minds. You obviously need to consider the fact that there is a very good chance things could change in the future (marriage talk IS a bit early) and to avoid doing anything that could get the two of you into trouble, but if you can work with that, then by all means go for it.

 

And you should probably lay off of Genn, guys. Maybe you weren't ganging up on the guy, but it definitely seems like you're ganging up on her right now, and that's no better. Let's end this before it starts to get out of hand.

 

I'm not ganging up on anyone .Just addressing the given discussion .She asked why so I answered .Having a different opinion doesnt mean you are ganging up .It means you just dont agree with the other person . No one is attacking anyone from what I can see nor do I have a reason to ..I just asked why my opinion is" ganging up on him " when he came here asking for all our opinions