Flirting/Dating Avice Thread

[Kinode 3,056]

Tittle.

Just post your advice.

I've found a site that had some nice advice.

Flirting's a language - and just like with any other language, no one's born a fluent flirt. If you want to know how to flirt like a pro, you've got to learn the signs. Follow these flirt tips and practice till you're an expert flirt.

 

1. Choose Your Targets

You don't have to have a crush on someone in order to flirt. Practice flirting with random people you see every day - people who might not even be on your dating radar - on order to hone your skills. That way, you'll have some flirting experience under your belt when you approach the people who really matter.

 

2. Have an Opening Line

Find a reason to talk to the person. If you're in a class with them, come up with a question about an assignment. If they're standing in line behind you at a concert, ask about the band. Get creative, and be ready to respond to whatever they say.

 

3. Make Eye Contact

If you don't make eye contact, you'll look bored or uninterested, and that's not an impression you want to give. Too shy to look them right in the eyes? Here's a trick: look at the spot right between their eyes. It'll look like eye contact to them.

 

4. Come Up With a Compliment

Pick one thing you like about the way they look - like their hair, their smile or an article of clothing. Let them know in a friendly way how much you like it. It'll make them feel good and will open them up to you. (If you can't think of an opening line for tip #2, a compliment will do.)

 

5. Smile

You don't have to go all Bozo the Clown, but the idea is to look like you enjoy talking to them. So be sure to throw them a smile whenever it makes sense. If they shoot one back, you'll know that they like talking to you, too.

 

6. Flirt With Your Body

 

The body language you use when you flirt is just as important as what you say. Use good posture, point your body towards the person and try to find excuses to touch them. For more on how to do that, check these body language flirting tips.

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You see someone from across the room and think: Wow. I want to meet them. But how can you be sure that your body language conveys your true intentions - to flirt?

These body language cues are excellent ways to show the object of your interest that you'd like to get to know them better. And if someone uses these cues on you? Flirt right back -- because flirting is harmless, and practice makes perfect.

 

How To Flirt With Your Eyes

 

Holding eye contact with someone you find appealing for approximately five seconds is well-used flirt tactic, mostly because it is highly effective, although its ease and simplicity of use doesn't hurt. According to the book, "The Definitive Guide of Body Language," by Alan and Barbara Pease, the person initiating the flirt will - on average - need to lock eyes three times before the flirt recipient catches on.

 

How To Flirt By Preening

 

There are many, many ways one groom themselves in public in a flattering yet flirty way, depending on your gender. Ladies can try some hair stroking, posture enhancing, neck exposing, hip tilting (if standing), clothes straightening or lip licking - all with the intention of calling attention to her attractiveness. Men can also straighten their clothing, lick their lips or fix their hair, but they should also include things like hooking their fingers into their pants (if standing), suck in their stomach, or take deep breaths to increase the size of their chest. For both men and women, try to use preening body language that shows off your best features while enhancing what makes you, you.

 

How To Flirt With A Smile

 

There are few things better than receiving a genuine, radiant smile from a stranger, yet many people don't respond to them as a flirt tactic. Therefore, use your smile in conjunction with the other body language ideas listed in this article to ensure whomever you've got your eye on realizes a flirt is your intention.

 

How To Flirt By Pointing

 

No, not by using your finger silly. Instead, try to 'point' at the person you want to flirt with by moving your body towards them. Take your feet and make sure they are facing your flirt target, and use your shoulders to lean into them - even if you aren't speaking with them. Other ideas include facing your shoulders towards them or 'closing off' a space just for the two of you (such as crossing your legs towards each other).

 

How To Flirt Using Touch

 

Look for opportunities where you can touch the person you want to flirt with, either 'accidentally' or otherwise. Shaking hands is an excellent flirt tactic, because not only does it place your hands together (which conveys a "higher level of intimacy" according to Alan and Barbara Pease), but it is easy way to combine flirting with an introduction. You could also try carefully and casually placing your hands on the person's arms to very gently 'move' them so you can pass by on your way to the bathroom, or lightly tap their arm while sharing a laugh. And if you aren't quite comfortable touching the person you want to flirt with quite yet, you can try mimicking their movements for a short period of time (i.e. a couple of seconds), instead.)

 

7. Keep It Light

You'll get a way better response if you chat about fun, happy stuff (like your new puppy) than serious or sad stuff (like when your puppy got hit by a train). The point of flirting isn't to bare your soul or share your honest opinions about everything. It's to open the door to lots more conversations down the road.

 

8. Beware of Awkward Silences

Once the convo drags, it's probably gone for good. Fill an awkward silence by asking the other person a question. Can't think of one? Ask them about something they're wearing or something in your environment (like a painting on the wall, or the music that's playing).

 

9. Wrap It Up

If you're not interested in talking anymore, politely find an excuse to head off into the sunset. If you are interested, give them a way to get in touch with you - like your phone number or Facebook name. This is (hopefully) just your first convo of many, so save some of that charm for the next time.

 

10. Practice, Practice, Practice

 

No one's perfect at flirting the first time around. If the idea of flirting still gives you butterflies, don't worry - it just means that you need more practice. The more you flirt, the easier it'll get.

 

 

 

Since people don't always use actual words to express their feelings, sometimes you'll have to resort to looking for unconscious signs that your crush likes you back. If 3 or more of the below signs are true, there's a good chance your crush likes you back. (Of course, you could always just ask them out and see what they say.)

 

1. He Brags About Himself to You

 

Courtesy of Getty Images

 

If he always seems to be telling you stories that demonstrate how awesome he is, he's trying to prove himself to be worthy of you. It's sort of like the human equivalent of peacocks showing off their feathers. Yeah, it's a little pathetic...but if you like him back, then I'm sure you won't mind.

 

2. She Wants to Talk to You

 

Courtesy of Getty Images

 

Even a pretty shy person will try to get close to you (either in person or through words) if she likes you. Bonus points if she calls you up out of the blue, just to talk. On the flip side, if your crush never seems to initiate conversations or return your calls and texts, then it's probably a lost cause.

 

3. You Catch Him Looking at You

 

Courtesy of Getty Images

 

Of course, this doesn't count if you've been staring at him for the past hour, hoping to get his attention, and he catches you in the act. It only counts if you glance over at him and caught him in mid-stare.

 

4. She Laughs at Your Jokes - Even If They're Not Funny

 

Courtesy of Getty Images

 

If she likes you, she'll be charmed by even the dumbest stuff that comes out of your mouth.

 

5. He Treats You Differently Than Other Girls

 

Courtesy of Getty Images

 

If he's sending you "I like you" vibes, they don't mean anything if he flirts the same way with everyone. For instance, if he's a notorious flirt, then he'll act shyer and more genuine around the girl he really likes.

 

6. Her Friends Tease Her About You

 

© iStockphoto

 

If her friends know she likes you, they won't be able to keep their traps shut when you're around. So watch them closely for signs that they know something you don't.

 

7. He Gets Into Stuff You Like

 

© iStockphoto

 

Is your non-punk crush suddenly downloading your favorite Green Day album? Did your jocko crush audition for the school play you told him you were trying out for? It's probably 'cause he wants to have something to talk to you about, or he wants to prove that you guys are totally made for each other.

 

 

Please post your own advice

[Iamkingdomhearts1000 1,170]

Be respectful of one another, Don't use each other simply just to have sex and also especially have fun while your in a relationship with the one you love because you never know what's going to happen.

[Icarus 161]

WHERE WAS THIS THREAD WHEN I NEEDED IT!?

 

The 3 time eye thing actually works. I used it last night and it really works. No lies.

[Uncle Dolan 963]

Don't use each other simply just to have sex

 

LIES.

[Iamkingdomhearts1000 1,170]

LIES.

 

You never know man, I mean, There are people who do actually do that unfortunetly, So just be careful if you ever meet a person that is actually like that, The same goes for everyone else too.

[Uncle Dolan 963]

You never know man, I mean, There are people who do actually do that unfortunetly, So just be careful if you ever meet a person that is actually like that, The same goes for everyone else too.

 

I'm joking, even though I'm kinda sex-driven, I wouldn't use a woman just for sex.

[Iamkingdomhearts1000 1,170]

I'm joking, even though I'm kinda sex-driven, I wouldn't use a woman just for sex.

 

Oh okay, Sorry about that, Im a kind of serious person heh :].

[animemylove 439]

it's good to start off as friends, flirting can be fun .. (i tend to pet them to see how they react, though it's usually a glare lol). just have fun and if you pop out the question and it's a no don't let it ruin your friendship.

[kalnet 1,198]

I will just copypasta what I've typed in another forum I'm at. Lazy to type out the same thing again. This can be applied to everyone.

 

A person who whines about being rejected is giving the power of his self-worth to another person. In effect, this means he has no self-worth because he isn't evaluating himself, someone else is doing it for him. This is also true with articles/topics on attraction. It is all assuming what the other party wants and adapting to it. Once again, putting the power of evaluation onto an external source. Where the hell are your standards?

 

Peer pressure is often the reason why guys chase certain girls. Whether its because all your friends have one, or maybe its just to show off how "macho/cool/awesome" you are by having a hot chick by your side. Is it really necessary though? Would that really make you happy? So ask yourselves, what do you really want in a partner, heck... what do you really want in LIFE? Will the woman you want fit in the life you want to lead? Set your standards, know what you want, know what you need and you will have a direction.

 

Humans are not the borg, everyone is different. Each and every girl has their own tastes, standards, personality, quirks, etc. Its impossible to be a man who can please them all. Since you can't please everyone, why don't you find the girls who matter? The girls you really want? Now that you've set a standard, its time for you to qualify the people you meet and see if they meet your standard.

 

Say for example, you're a handsome guy, but happy with a "not so attractive" girl who loves you dearly and meets what you look for in a partner. Others may say "omg, you can do so much better" or "Dude, why are you settling for less?". None of that matters, you've found someone who meets your criteria and you're happy. THAT is what is important.

 

Now if you truly want the best, like a woman who's beautiful, intelligent, funny, loving, loyal, rich, kinky, etc. then be prepared for a hard journey. As much as you have standards, they will to. So you will have to improve yourself to meet their standards but not at the cost of your own standards. Chase what you want as much as you like, but what you want, must also have what you need. Remember, wants are optional, needs are a requirement.

 

So basically be who you want to be, don't bother with what people think of you. Do what makes you happy and you'll attract those who will suit your lifestyle. In the end, its your happiness that matters, not trying to prove yourself to be better than others. You must have a life of your own, and your partner is someone you share that life with.

[Matthew 74]

X_X ... thats a lot of information. Um I'm 15,shy, and I go to church.My class is a youth group which my crush is in. I don't plan on dating,and in this case flirting,until I'm 16... and... you know what FORGET IT... there's too much information and history to tell you! Um,well,I will say we don't know each other that well at ALL.But yeah,too much information and history for me to tell you.Well,not THAT much history but too much for me to tell.

[FireRubies1 1,325]

Damn it's mostly heterosexual Thank you....

[Ivan 969]

If you're hot for a guy, don't paralyze him from the waist down. Shoot him through the chest instead.

[XIIISwords 1,059]

4. She Laughs at Your Jokes - Even If They're Not Funny

 

Courtesy of Getty Images

 

If she likes you, she'll be charmed by even the dumbest stuff that comes out of your mouth.

 

 

Then I'm in luck.