My Relationship with Kingdom Hearts

[Allwil13 754]

So I don't usually post things like this, but I've been thinking about this a lot with everything that's happened so far this year and I wanted to get it off my chest. Buckle up, everyone; this is going to be a long one.

Here's the thing about my relationship with this series; I actually don't think the story is all that great, at least technically speaking. The story is convoluted and insanely complicated, and it's been clear for a while that they've been making things up as they go. My boyfriend and I were talking about the series' story and he pointed out that at this point it seems like the series isn't very welcoming towards newcomers. More specifically, if someone new wants to try out the newest release, there's no way to do that without playing through the rest of the series first. He's never been interested in the series, and at this point he just feels that it just isn't worth all that work at this point. Which is fair. Now, this isn't to say that I don't like the story; I love it! I just don't think they were smart about writing it. There are also some more minor issues with the series that I just plain ignore, and I know that I am biased when it comes to the series. I've known for a while that two of the major elements that kept me so passionate about the series since its inception were nostalgia and my mother.

In 2000, when I was 8, my parents bought a Playstation 2 along with a few PS1 games. I was hooked instantly, playing Spyro 2 constantly and making it the first game that I ever 100 percented. Fast forward to 2002, when I saw a commercial on TV for a new game from Squaresoft called Kingdom Hearts. I was mesmerized instantly upon seeing the disney characters, and at Christmas it was waiting for me under the Christmas tree. Kingdom Hearts instantly became my favourite game, and I felt a special attachment to it because it was the first console game that was truly mine. To my great surprise my mother became a huge fan of it as well, starting up her own file and playing through the game herself. She loved sharing theories with me about where the game would go and what twists would happen. 

As the years went by I continued to follow the series closely, but with the release of Kingdom Hearts 2 my mother lost interest. She hated Kingdom Hearts 2's story and gameplay, and our connection over the series was restricted only to the first entry. I also got older and our relationship became somewhat strained; she didn't understand my interests in anime and video games and I subsequently stopped trying to share my interests with her. But we could always talk about the first Kingdom Hearts game and reminisce about how fun it was to play. When Kingdom Hearts 3 came out last year, she even expressed interest in trying it out when she and my dad came up to visit. 

Fast forward to 2020. At the beginning of this year, my mother was diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer. Despite going in for surgery to remove the tumor a few weeks later, she passed away a month later. Shortly after my boyfriend and I returned home to go back to work, I started a new game in the first Kingdom Hearts in my mother's memory and 100 percented it for her. This subsequently turned into a playthrough of the entire series because I have no self control, and also because we'd been laid off at that point due to COVID so I had a lot more free time. But it was during this series playthrough that I discovered something. When I play a Kingdom Hearts game, the connection to my mother feels stronger. Our shared love of the original Kingdom Hearts is one of my fondest memories from my childhood, and I'm so happy that we had that.

Ironically, my mom always insisted that video games were antisocial, (unless they were multiplayer) and that they didn't serve much purpose aside from entertainment. But I believe now, more than ever, that they can be powerful emotional connectors and provide comfort in challenging times. 

Kingdom Hearts is a beloved franchise that has become so important to me, but it wasn't until recently that i realized just how much of an impact it has had on my life. I sometimes wonder how my mother's and my relationship would have ended up if I hadn't gotten the game and we'd never developed that connection. And don't get me wrong; my mother and I had a good relationship by the end, albeit with a few remaining bumps. She and my boyfriend always butted heads, and she never truly accepted the fact that I moved to another province to be with him. But Kingdom Hearts was always there, an unbreakable strand that connected us. 

Sorry for the long rant; this has been on my mind for a few weeks now and I wanted to get it out. If you've made it this far, thanks for reading. May your heart be your guiding key.  

[SweetYetSalty 330]

Thanks for sharing such a personal KH story with your history with it. May your heart be your guiding key as well.

Edited May 21, 2020 by SweetYetSalty