Eterna 274 Posted August 5, 2010 Grettings everyone, my name is Eterna, For 5 months now I have lurked these forums. watching, waiting, Biding my time if you will. But now it is time to come clean. In secret I have been working on a goal, an achievement so astounding it brings a smile to my lips just thinking of it. My friends, I have achieved a weight of 903 Pounds. 5 months of eating nothing but Doritos and Microwavable macoroni has all led to this My time of glory, my time of rememberance. Oh sure it was hard, making clothes out of tarps is never an easy ordeal, hiding stretch marks on my face was also a challenge, tapping two benches together for a computer chair? never easy. I now plan to head to guinenss world records and inform them of my new record size. That was the plan anyhow, until I realized I could no longer move. That is where you guys come in, you MUST inform guinness World records of this! Now go! and quickly! my lifespan has been cut in two and I have little over two weeks to live! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoxSox 3,593 Posted August 5, 2010 ... Whatever the hell happened to the wicked witch of the lols... of which I loved? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Eterna 274 Posted August 5, 2010 ... Whatever the hell happened to the wicked witch of the lols... of which I loved? She was absorbed into the unholy mass that is my body. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoxSox 3,593 Posted August 6, 2010 Well. We're screwed... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keyblader 325 Posted August 6, 2010 This makes me laugh, but seriously, i hope this is a totally awesome gag Share this post Link to post Share on other sites