1 In the beginning, there was nothing. And then something happened and the Universe began. And the Universe formed itself in the image of a circular object. With cheese. And his name was Za. Za roamed the Universe, and he came upon a sphere in the ether that caught his attention. And it's name was Earth. And Za looked down on the Earth, and he saw that it was good.
2 But it could be better. Za saw in the Earth a great potential. But it was not yet groovy enough. And so Za made a decision. And he said "I will bestow upon this planet my own greatness."
3 On the first day, Za bought some ingredients. And it was good.
4 On the next day, Za arranged the ingredients in an orderly fashion on his kitchen counter. And it was good.
5 On the third day, Za preheated the oven. And it was good.
6 On the fourth day, Za made the dough, and set it out to rise. And it was promising.
7 On the fifth day, Za kneaded the dough. And it was hard, for Za had no hands. But in the end, it was good.
8 On the sixth day, Za spread the sauce across the surface of the dough, and the smell was intoxicating.
9 On the seventh day, Za sprinkled mozzarella cheese atop the sauce, and it was glistening white, and beautiful.
10 On the eight day, Za spent several hours sitting on the couch, debating what toppings he wanted to add.
11 On the ninth day, Za came to a conclusion. He placed upon the cheese pepperoni, and sausage, and bacon. And it was oh so very good.
12 On the tenth and final day, Za did put the creation in the oven. He waited twenty minutes, and as the timer went off, he took the creation out of the oven. He pondered over his creation, which was made in his own image, and suddenly, a name came to him. The creation would be known as Pizza.
13 Za then went on to bestow the creation unto the Earth. For 40 days and 40 nights, Pizza rained down unto creation, and it was perfect. The humans who lived upon the planet ate the Pizza. They ate all of the Pizza. And Za saw that the humans were happy, and he was satisfied with his creation.
14. The humans would go on to reverse engineer the Pizza, and to this very day, it is eaten, and loved.
Book 1
Genesis
1 In the beginning, there was nothing. And then something happened and the Universe began. And the Universe formed itself in the image of a circular object. With cheese. And his name was Za. Za roamed the Universe, and he came upon a sphere in the ether that caught his attention. And it's name was Earth. And Za looked down on the Earth, and he saw that it was good.
2 But it could be better. Za saw in the Earth a great potential. But it was not yet groovy enough. And so Za made a decision. And he said "I will bestow upon this planet my own greatness."
3 On the first day, Za bought some ingredients. And it was good.
4 On the next day, Za arranged the ingredients in an orderly fashion on his kitchen counter. And it was good.
5 On the third day, Za preheated the oven. And it was good.
6 On the fourth day, Za made the dough, and set it out to rise. And it was promising.
7 On the fifth day, Za kneaded the dough. And it was hard, for Za had no hands. But in the end, it was good.
8 On the sixth day, Za spread the sauce across the surface of the dough, and the smell was intoxicating.
9 On the seventh day, Za sprinkled mozzarella cheese atop the sauce, and it was glistening white, and beautiful.
10 On the eight day, Za spent several hours sitting on the couch, debating what toppings he wanted to add.
11 On the ninth day, Za came to a conclusion. He placed upon the cheese pepperoni, and sausage, and bacon. And it was oh so very good.
12 On the tenth and final day, Za did put the creation in the oven. He waited twenty minutes, and as the timer went off, he took the creation out of the oven. He pondered over his creation, which was made in his own image, and suddenly, a name came to him. The creation would be known as Pizza.
13 Za then went on to bestow the creation unto the Earth. For 40 days and 40 nights, Pizza rained down unto creation, and it was perfect. The humans who lived upon the planet ate the Pizza. They ate all of the Pizza. And Za saw that the humans were happy, and he was satisfied with his creation.
14. The humans would go on to reverse engineer the Pizza, and to this very day, it is eaten, and loved.
praise be to Za
Edited by RoxSoxKH