Cows

[TheApprenticeofKingMickey 3,689]

Socialism: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbor.

Communism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.

Fascism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and sells you some milk.

Nazism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and shoots you.

Bureaucratism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away..

Traditional Capitalism: You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull. You herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

An American Corporation: You have 2 cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.

A French Corporation: You have 2 cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

Japanese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them Worldwide.

An Italian Corporation: You have 2 cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

A Swiss Corporation: You have 5000 cows. None of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

Chinese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.

An Iraqi Corporation: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No one believes you and they bomb your arse. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy.......

Counter Culture: 'Wow, dig it, like there's these 2 cows, man, grazing in the hemp field. You gotta have some of this milk!'

Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

Apathyologism: You have 2 cows. You do not care.

Fatalist: You have 2 doomed cows...

Atheism: You have 2 cows. There is no God.

A West-Country Corporation: You have 2 cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.

A Brazilian Corporation: You have 2 cows. You pay taxes for 6 cows. You have to sell one cow in order to pay the taxes. Your remaining cow gets sick and dies while waiting for availability in the public vet hospital.

Russia: You have two cows. Since they are both female, if you happen to keep them in the same stable you will pay a 5,000 rouble fine for homosexual propaganda.

PETA: You have two cows. You kill them both. You then use naked women to convince other people that killing cows is wrong.

Moffat: You have two cows. Both of them are your daughters time traveling from the past where they had a brief love affair with Da Vinci making you the rightful Queen of England. As you assume the throne, you throw them off a building.

Hussie: You have 2 cows. You ask for another one. Instead of getting just 1 cow, you get 2,485,506 cows.

Romney: You have 2 cows. You are not the president of the united states.

Once-ler: You have 1 cow. Everyone decides to make 5 different versions of that cow.

Old Spice: You have 2 cows. The cows are now diamonds. I'm on a horse.

An Irish Corporation: You have a million cows because they're everywhere

Tumblr: You have 2 cows. You ship them together and make GIF posts screaming about how much you love your cows, but they should stop existing because they are so perfect.

Also Tumblr: I give you a hamburger.

Cows: The shit you go through.

This post: Started off as a post that explained different goverments but then everything changed when the fire nation attacked.

 

Thought it'd be interesting to share. (8

Edited February 3, 2013 by TheApprenticeofKingMickey

[Demyx. 10,064]

I don't know what this says but I liked it anyway.

 

Put me in handcuffs. I must be abusing the like system.

[SinHeartlessAngel 555]

I stopped at Socialism, Too many big words. Aint nobody got time fo dat.

[TheApprenticeofKingMickey 3,689]

GUYS THE LAST SENTENCE OF THE ENTIRE THING IS THE BEST PART

[SinHeartlessAngel 555]

GUYS THE LAST SENTENCE OF THE ENTIRE THING IS THE BEST PART

I think i lol'd more at this post then the last sentence, and i don't know why.

[TheApprenticeofKingMickey 3,689]

I think i lol'd more at this post then the last sentence, and i don't know why.

 

Q_Q

[Pyrrha Nikos 1,162]

i had a feeling you were going to post this

 

i cant stop laughing at the few last sentences

[Weiss 8,279]

nfajsnfangkenwa

my mind cannot comprehend the greatness

[Hei 3,233]

Earthworm Jim: You have 1 cow. It is launched and ends up hitting someone in the credits.

[Number XV 490]

American company=best by far.

Edited February 3, 2013 by Number XV

[Shana09 5,769]

"Atheism: You have 2 cows. There is no God"

This is perfect.

[Blake 776]

The sad life of U-kow

[Keyblader 325]

A similar, more government-type oriented version of this was in my highschool history class room.  I think I like this better

 

My faves are:

An American Corporation

Japanese Corporation (This one was just really funny lol)

An Italian Corporation

A Swiss Corporation

Chinese Corporation

Surrealism (Randomness at it's finest)

Apathyologism

Fatalist (This one is just wonderful)

Atheism (The relevance is just...I don't even know )

Russia (Yay for homosexual-cow-propoganda ^_^)

PETA (Silly PETA)

Moffat (This...This is just...BRILLIANT!)

Old Spice (I sense the diamonds have to do with the Creature Parody of the commercials )

 

This was just awesome btw.

Edited February 3, 2013 by Keyblader

[Ruby 224]

I can't believe I read the whole thing.The last few sentences where priceless . I can't stop laughing

[Paranoia 494]

I don't know what this says but I liked it anyway.

 

Put me in handcuffs. I must be abusing the like system.

Someone call the mods, there's a like tyrant on the loose.

[Indecypher 495]

I read the entire thing, quite funny.

 

It was interesting, thank you for sharing.

[TheApprenticeofKingMickey 3,689]

I read the entire thing, quite funny.

 

It was interesting, thank you for sharing.

 

Bless your soul.

[Indecypher 495]

Bless your soul.

 

Haha, thank you.

[Kinode 3,056]

I give you a hamburger

THE BRAIZLIAN CORP. ONE THOUGH I'M CRYING

Edited February 3, 2013 by Kinode